


Sonic’s Foolhouse

by Juice_Time



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog - Fandom
Genre: M/M, We will all die, sonknux
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-16
Updated: 2019-09-16
Packaged: 2020-10-19 18:09:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20661521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Juice_Time/pseuds/Juice_Time
Summary: literal shitposting.





	1. Marine the Raccoon

Blaze was Marine the Raccoon’s best friend...but Blaze was getting tired of Marine’s antics, so she dropped her off on the forgotten Flicky Island.

“Okay Marine,” Blaze said. “I’m going to fucking GET the fuckin literal trash you requested. Don’t say I never do anything for you.”  
Marine just did an 👌 so Blaze teleported and never came back.

———————

6000 years later...

———————

Marine had been getting tired of staying on Flicky Island, for the colors were too bright for her...and she missed her friends. Though, she stood loyal to Blaze and waited in the exact spot.  
A Flicky flew above her, and spat out an old TV right in front of her, which turned on and had Blaze on it.

‘Finally something! Finally news!,’ thought Marine. It said Blaze was...participating in a race...with no trash in sight??  
She looked all over the screen, but she couldn’t find a single trash can.  
“I-it’s okay...!,” Marine said. “I-it’s probably in h-her car! She’ll be back...!”

“Oh yeah and by the way,” blaze said on the tv. “I dont have any garbage and have no intent nor did i EVER have intent to give garbage to a poor raccoon girl, either.”

Marine burst into tears, now knowing her waiting was futile. Her tears were so strong, they flooded the entire Flicky Island, and drove her ashore to the Team Sonic Racing place.

She glared at Blaze, Silver, and Vector, who was paid to be here. “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well, you never fooled me before, so technically the shame is ENTIRELY on you,” she muttered.  
She looked over to Team Sonic, who were attempting to eat the Emerald Hill coconuts.  
“Sonic, why the fuck cant I eat the coconuts?!,” Knuckles cried into his hands. “Every time I try, its like they’re only part of the background, and I cant reach them........”  
so while sonic and knuckles kissed to calm eachother down, marine hijacked Sonic’s car. “Gotta go fast,” Marine said, putting the car on. But Marine doesnt have a drivers license due to being 3 years old, so she was arrested. In fact, almost EVERYONE was arrested bc they have the collective age of 5 yet theyre trying to drive

“Hahahhaha, this was my evil plan all Along!,” the eggs man said to all the sonic characters in their cells. “You all got arreted for driving crimes, so nobody can stop me from stealing the Chaos Emeralds!”  
“Man shut up, said Marine, who beat the shit out of eggman robot nik. Everyone on the bus cheered.  
“Wow Marine you can be my friend now, im sorry for the wrror of my ways” Blaze said, but Marine refused.  
“blaze im gonna be honest with you. I’ve learned i dont need you anymore,” said Marine.”what i need........is a good butterfinger.

So Marine ate a butterfinger, except ro the botnik laid a finger on it, so she killed him for good this time. Dont Lay a Finegr On My Butterfinger!  
Then rouge adopted her and taught her how to do crimes.

The End


	2. Creams the Rabb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cream

Cream the rabbit was having a tea party with Cheese. It was a nice, sunny day. Birds were blooming, flowers were singing...  
...on days like this, kids like you...  
...S H O U L D B E B U R N I N G I N H E L L

Cream accidentally spilled SO MUCH tea on Cheese that he turned into Melted Cheese. “Oh no!,” said the rabbit. “I guess I need to buy another Chao!”  
However, considering the long line of dead Cheeses, Cream considered that Vanilla might not be so willing to buy a 69,666,420,613st Cheese, so she had to think.  
“Hmmmmm...oh! You know what always works? A lemonade stand!” so cream opened a lemonade stand.

Bum bum bum. Budum bum bum.  
Bean the Duck walked up to the lemonade stand  
And he said to the woman running the stand  
“Hey!”  
Bum bum bum  
“Got any grapes?”  
Bum bum bum bum budum bum budum  
The bun said “No, we just sell lemonade, but it’s cold and it’s fresh and it’s all homemade! Can I get you a glass?”  
The duck said, “Ill pass.”  
Then he waddled away (waddle waddle)  
Then he waddled away (waddle waddle)  
Then he waddled away (waddle waddle waddle waddle)  
Till the very next day

Then Shadow the came by and drank some lemonade because he’s nice. “What’s the cost?,” he asked.  
“Your life.”  
“Wh–“  
Cream shot him, and all his rings popped out. She stole them and ran off. Shadow is dead.

Cream went to the chao store and told the cashier, Infinite, this: “can i get a mcfuckin uuuuuuuuuh chao” and infinite said “fuck you. I bought ALL the chao to spite you and you specifically. Now there are no chao left to buy and also I am broke. I’ll fight you for your money.”  
Megalovania plaid because Infinite was about to fight Cream, when suddenly Vanilla came and tore him like wet paper bc he threatened her baby.

“Now, Cream, if you wanted to buy a Chao, you could have asked me!,” vanilla stole a chao even though it was supposed to go to Shadow when Infinite died according to Infinite’s will but Shadow’s dead too so it’s okay. They all lived happily ever after.   
The End

**Author's Note:**

> that’s it. go home


End file.
